Outside the Species
by SilverWolf7
Summary: The Doctor isn't attracted to his own species.  After a very bad marriage and stealing a TARDIS, he finds himself in the sexual world of other species, mainly human, and connects with it in different ways.


Be warned that there is a lot of dark content in this story. None of it is extremely graphic though, so it is appropriate enough to put up here under the M rating. This story includes content that deals with sexual abuse by a spouse, non con/rape, non explicit underage sex, voyeurism, mentions of BDSM, abandonment issues, depression, and maybe more i can't think of from the top of my head.

The style of writing is weird, in which there are two POV's, both from the Doctor. There is companion time and wife time before the TARDIS. Half is written as a fun romp, the other half in a juvenile way. Yes, this was done on purpose. It makes it, from what I am told, more creepy than would be expected from something written by me.

This was my Dark Fest fic for this year.

* * *

Outside the Species

He had run away in a stolen TARDIS.

Granted, his life hadn't been the best, but he probably shouldn't have left his family like he had. All except for his granddaughter, who had decided upon the name Susan, after this little stop on a small planet called Earth by the natives. It was very human, and not at all a Time Lord name, but it seemed to suit her well, so he let her choose.

Humans. He found the species entirely too primitive, but they looked identical to Gallifreyans on the outside.

He wasn't to know how much more he'd like other species, and especially the primitive species native to the planet he knew as Sol 3, until he ended up stuck for a few months on the planet, and Susan decided to start schooling there to see how humans learned at her age.

* * *

Ian and Barbara were close, he could see it and so could Susan.

According to his granddaughter, they had been close before they had decided to break into his ship. They seemed even closer now.

They were always touching each other. Hugs, holding hands, little touches for no reason at all to shoulders and hips. A few times he had caught one of them gently slapping the other's backside. He wondered if these were ways in which humans chose a mate, because they didn't do it to any other person. Well, except for the hugging thing, they did that to quite a few people.

So, one behaviour that meant comfort and others he could only surmise to be pre-mating rituals.

Because he now knew for a fact they were in one of the rooms for sleeping and having sex. He was an old man now in this body! He was supposed to not be interested in said activities. He had grown out of it. For that matter, he had never truly had the urge for sex himself.

Knowing what was happening in the other room, though, was changing his self image entirely. Because, hearing Ian and Barbara having sex through a closed door was making him aroused. He had even managed to gain an erection, something that had never spontaneously happened to him, except during his adolescent years.

There must have been an aphrodisiac put in the food where they had landed, or, perhaps something in the drink. This wasn't him, and it definitely wasn't normal to be lusting after someone not of your own species.

He shrugged it off as some type of ingested tampering with his systems, wandered to his own room and waited rather impatiently for the side effects to wear off.

That idea was dropped a month later when he met Cameca, had fallen madly in love with her and during their few nights together found out just how active in the bedroom he really could be if he liked the person he was with the right way.

* * *

"Please, don't make me marry her. I'm not interested!" The young man, known to his classmates by the designated name Theta Sigma, shouted at his father. The argument was an old one, but the moment had arrived where there would be no turning back until an heir to the House name was born. And, given he was the only child born of his parents, it was his job to procreate.

But he wasn't, as he had just shouted, interested.

He had told his parents sometime after he had reached puberty that he thought he was asexual. He had never been sexually attracted to anyone, and it had worried him constantly through his adolescence.

He had failed the Academy the first time, since he hadn't been able to concentrate on anything enough due to his worry that they would find out there was something wrong with him.

He had barely managed to scrape by the second time, but he had and, now that he was in the Time Lord Academy studying his dream job, he had shed the worries over his sexual preference, or lack thereof, and studied.

He wasn't having many problems now, and he had even made some friends. Koschei and Ushas.

He'd still be able to continue his studies once he was married off like his father wanted, but he'd have to study while also being a husband. Was he even capable of having sex? He knew from puberty he could get and hold an erection, but he had never _used_ one before. What if he couldn't perform at the right time? What if, although he could do his duties and perform, he wasn't very good at it?

He would be unable to divorce his wife until after a child was born, and it was more than likely she would keep the child for her own House, rather than let him take care of it for his own. Which meant a marriage of convenience, in which he would be forced to do something he had absolutely no interest in, to a woman he had still yet to meet.

He wondered briefly if this fell under an act of sexual assault. Not by his parents it wasn't, and to them that was all that mattered.

Too bad about his childhood days when he had actually gotten along well with his father and mother. His weird ways had even turned them off him. Still, he would soon be the first of his House to gain the title of Time Lord. He couldn't be doing his family any more honour than that. It was an honoured title to have.

"Shut up and do as you're told for once," came the answer to his plea. "Your wife is living in the house just ahead."

His wife. This was not happening. Not to him. His life had finally got on track, and he was now about to have it pulled out from underneath him. Again. As if the teasing and taunting throughout his early Academy days hadn't been enough. Now he would probably have to sit through it at home too.

He wondered if it was possible to stay in his dorm with Koschei, and go to his wife every night for an hour with the hopes of hurrying up and getting her pregnant. He'd be able to live his life then, with minimal trouble.

His hearts sank as he noticed that the wife chosen for him was Reschal, one of his tormentors throughout his early Academy days.

This, he knew, was going to be Hell. And his father didn't care.

Why did no one care?

* * *

He had been lovers with Jamie since the boy had first shown an interest in continually touching him. It was the first experience with a male lover for the both of them, and after a few times in which things seemed to go slightly wrong, they had fallen into a nice pattern which they were both comfortable with.

Ben and Polly had taken it all in their stride, being swingers, both of them. They believed in love, no matter the person, and both had willingly slept with him and Jamie respectively once they found they were comfortable enough with it.

Jamie was slightly shy about sexuality, but he didn't mind that. He had, after all, only recently found his own and remembered that shyness. He was sure the boy would grow out of it.

Once Victoria came onto the scene, her conservative ways made it clear the Doctor was unwelcome with advances. Jamie, however, fulfilled her need to be loved in a sexual way. He himself had become something of a substitute father, after the death of her own. So he lost his sexual partner and had taken up spying through their door, one hand holding the door frame, the other furiously moving to their movements in his pants.

Jamie knew, there was no way the boy couldn't, but Victoria had never found out.

Once she had left, he finally felt like he was whole again, when Jamie came back to his bed.

And then they met and took on Zoe.

Zoe, unlike Victoria, was from the future, and the future of the human species was much more open about sexuality and how many partners one could have. She willingly took both of them on. At the same time. His first foray into what humans called a 'threesome' hadn't lasted very long. Both his young companions opting that he should be the one in the middle. He had never felt anything quite like being taken behind while taking someone from the front at the same time.

He had got better and occasionally one of the others would be in the middle, but usually it was him. Mentor to one, intellectual equal to the other. They evened themselves out to become quite the team, both in bed and out.

The anger at his fellow Time Lords when they had found out what he was doing and deemed it below him to interact with other species had been so strong, it had led to him losing both of them, their memories wiped clean of him but for their first adventure together. As further punishment, he had been forced to regenerate.

Reschal had been invited to watch. The divorce had been rather messy.

* * *

"Go have a bath. I refuse to look at you until you are clean!" his wife snapped at him, after the wedding vows had been made and the cake covering his front (it was convenient, he thought, that it was the husband who got the cake dumped on him by the wife) was seriously making Reschal's eyes bulge with disgust.

"Next time don't make me dirty then!" he snapped, as he made his way through the house they had been given by their families, and ran himself a hot bath. He'd never be rid of her, but at least he could get the cake off himself and his clothes.

Once he was clean, he re-entered the spacious family room of the house, where Reschal was waiting for him, wanting a proper inspection of what she had just come into property of. Him. He already felt dirty enough to go back for another bath and nothing untoward had yet truly happened between them.

Dread was setting into his bones and his stomach felt like it was weighed down. Would she even be interested in having sex? Because she had less pressure from her family to produce an heir with him. She was the youngest of four children. She was unneeded for such activities.

She might decide his family's need for an heir was less important than her disgust in him and choose not to sleep with him.

He actually hoped this would happen. The divorce would be amenable then, for both of them. His father would just have to find someone else for the odd, freak boy who wouldn't know temporal from spatial if both were anthropomorphic and dancing around in front of him in tutus.

He had seen a tutu once, on his studies of Terran life forms. And those were considered a primitive, but thriving community of adequately intelligent people. Nothing intelligent could ever wear something so short and frilly. It was unnatural.

"Well, strip!" Reschal ordered and, with a gulp of fear, he slowly got out of the clothes he had just put on and tried not to cover his private bits with his hands.

She studied him, especially where he didn't want her looking, and watched as her eyes lit up. "Hmm, not a waste of time after all, Thete. You are well proportioned. How big are you hard?"

He blinked at her. Was she honestly asking him to tell her this, when he had no idea? He had never been interested in measuring an erection before, not really caring how big or small he was compared to the other males around him. "Umm, dunno. Never measured," he answered, when his silence obviously began grating on her nerves.

She sighed loudly, reached out and grabbed him by the penis, moving her hand fast and a bit roughly over his flesh. His body responded faster than he had hoped it would and he felt a bit ashamed of himself for it. In next to no time, he was at full attention.

Reschal's eyes lit up even further. "Very nice. Your father informs me you're a virgin and don't touch yourself. You'll soon learn what to do with it. And it is a nice and pleasing shape and length for me. You will do nicely for a husband, regardless of your...shyness. We'll have to work on your hair trigger first though."

He stared at her blankly, not knowing what the hell that meant. "My what?"

"This!" she replied, reaching down, giving a few more rough tugs and his world exploded in front of his eyes. A grunt passed his lips and he looked down at his already softening organ, to find her hand and part of her wedding robes spattered with creamy white strands of semen.

"New guys never last long. Not long enough to please me at any rate. You'll get there though. Just keep on tugging on this thing, and you'll learn."

Keep on...? She had no intention of doing this for him herself? Well, that was at least something he could get used to. The rush was still with him slightly, the release of unexpected hormones. He was kind of glad that she wouldn't just grab him any time she felt like he needed a lesson. He could go at his own pace. Maybe this wouldn't be as bad as he thought it would be, and at least until he was ready his pleasure could be his own instead of hers...

He had some control over this unwanted situation.

* * *

He was angry. To be fair, he had been put on trial for his friends and their species, for stealing a TARDIS and for being a pain in the arse to the other Time Lords, but to forcefully make him regenerate, stealing his companions' memories and leave him on the godforsaken rock also known as Earth, he was doing remarkably well just being angry.

He could have turned out like Koschei, now going by the chosen name of the Master, and become evil. He hadn't.

Liz had been a rock to him. So much so that instead of sleeping with her himself, he had set her up with the Brigadier. As it was, he smiled and patted himself on the back one evening, when he heard them at it in the Brigadier's office. A job well done, that had been. Until she decided she'd had enough of him and left to go back to her school.

Jo on the other had been right up his alley. She was very young, and he seemed to like them very young. Too bad he probably would have got into trouble with the age difference just by looks between them, so, until he had got the Master's help in fixing up his TARDIS, he had spent his time furiously wanking in the TARDIS to her image, rather than actually having sex with her.

By the time the TARDIS was in at least some resemblance of working order, his hunger for her had grown so strong that as soon as they were in the time vortex, he had shoved her against the console and just plain took her. With her screaming out her pleasure and a whole chorus of very loud "Oh, Doctor YES!" he knew that she'd been thinking about him in sexual situations.

Jo liked older men. He liked young women. The situation worked perfectly. Until she met a young man and fell in love.

He stayed angry for the rest of that incarnation, and he hadn't touched Sarah Jane then in any way sexual. For that matter, she hadn't exactly warmed up to him fast, so with her he had decided to take his time...

* * *

He was in trouble.

He had forgotten quite a few nights to, as Reschal put it, tug on it. He didn't have any reason to, after all. He had tried using her image, but it turned him off. He tried using Koschei's image, but it did nothing for him. Hell, he used any and every face he remembered and nothing worked. The 'magic' just wasn't there. He was completely uninterested in sex and anything to go with it, no matter how good it might feel.

It was months after his marriage, Reschal was becoming extremely edgy, and he still had a few second count before he came.

"You know what? Forget this. I'll just have you anyway. Maybe tying something around it will keep you from coming early..."

She never called it a penis. It was always 'it'. Sometimes he wondered if she thought that the natural sexual body part of a male was something so dirty that, if it wasn't for pleasure or reproduction, she wouldn't even want to see one. But at the same time, she kept saying his pleased her in the looks department.

She had no trouble getting him hard. That still hadn't changed. His body was still getting used to being touched down there for sexual purposes and seemed to know when to grow hard on its own. When Reschal leaned over him and started looking for something in a drawer, he couldn't help but turn his head to see what she was getting. His breath hitched in his throat as he noted it was full of toys and accessories for sexual gratification.

She had fished out a ring. One that could be tightened or loosened, but not spring open. She grinned, put it around the base of his penis and tightened it.

"There, see if this is any better."

With that, she sat up, wriggled onto his lap, grabbed hold of him and gently sank down so he was fully inside her within a few seconds. The pleasure was intense, and he arched and cried out with it.

"Oh! Bloody hell, that feels good..." he stated, which was nothing compared to the long drawn out sigh of relief from his wife. Without any wait at all for him to adjust, she begun to move. His eyes rolled in his head and before he could stop himself he let out a cry of pleasure and gripped her hips.

He didn't want this, but by god it felt good. But he _didn't want this_. He tensed as he reached the point where he would have ejaculated, but found he couldn't. He squirmed, because the pleasure was getting too intense now and was beginning to physically hurt. His moans and cries of pleasure turned fast into groans of pain and he began, quite beyond his ability to stop himself, to beg.

"Please, please Reschal. Stop this. I need...I want...I am hurting! You're hurting me! Stop!"

She ignored his pleas and begun to set a faster pace, before giving up any pretences of going slow and rode him like her life depended on it. The slap of flesh on flesh filled the room as she turned the angle so she was rising and falling almost straight, instead of the grinding sensation of before.

It sent him wild.

His hips bucked up wildly in an attempt to come. He needed to come. If he came, then it would stop her from hurting him with pleasure any further.

"Yes, Thete, that's it. Like that!"

A long drawn out sound which he could not identify passed his lips, as he braced himself more fully and threw himself into the motion. If he could just come, or, he realised, get _her_ to come, this would be over.

She held on tightly to one of his thighs with one hand, digging her nails in and leaving small bloody indents in his flesh, while the other one began to rub her clitoris in fast, deliberate strokes. Oh god yes, this would soon be over. She was close now.

If there really were gods, they'd let her come soon so this torture would end.

Thankfully, she did a few long seconds later, throwing her head back and shouting out in her orgasm, her inner walls spasming around him and squeezing him unnecessarily. He began crying from not having any relief of his own.

Falling limply over him, she stayed like that for a few more seconds, before she shifted herself off of him, reached down and released the ring.

He screamed when he came. She hadn't even needed to touch him to finish him off. The feeling had been so damn intense, he felt like he was dying from it. And the one thing he knew was that he never ever wanted to go through that _ever again_.

Once he calmed down, he turned and glared at Reschal. "You hurt me. I don't like that, let's not do that again."

She grinned at him, and he knew that his words meant nothing to her, nothing at all. "We won't have to if you just got rid of your shyness of sex and learnt how to control yourself better. You come too soon."

He turned away from her. Just the sight of her was making him feel ill. And he was supposed to get this woman pregnant and have a child with her? He could barely stand to be in her presence. She had just...well, what she had just done was not right. But no one would believe him, because no one ever bothered listening to a word he said, because he was the weird one.

He needed to get out of this with both his and Reschal's lives intact, and somehow he would get there. He would soon be a Time Lord, and then he could get off this planet and never return to it, or her ever again.

* * *

Having Harry around while Sarah Jane was on board was an interesting experience. They fought, though nothing too serious, and he let Sarah Jane have her fun with the human doctor, before he would have his own fun with her.

Once Harry was gone, disappearing never to return again as far as he was concerned, he had taken Sarah Jane for his own. He could never have imagined just how invested he was in her until he had got the summons back to Gallifrey and had left her behind.

It was the first time he had truly _cried_ over anything since his marriage with Reschal.

So, when Leela wanted to come on board, his first instinct was to say no. And he did. But Leela had pushed her way on board and refused to leave. So, he found himself with a companion he had no intention of having. A very lovely female companion, with a fierceness that reminded him slightly of Reschal, but could be tempered if she chose to do so.

She also wore next to nothing. After a time, he decided to just do away with pretending and ended up being ridden in a chair in the kitchen with little provocation. Leela was not subordinate. Giving up his desire to be the dominant partner actually felt good when he had been with Leela.

He had thought he would always want to be the dominant one since his marriage. This wasn't forced sex though, but very much wanted sex. And the best thing yet, he had no greater feeling for her than any other normal companion of his. She kept him company, they had great sex and they were good friends. He was sure he'd never fall in love again, and that was a good thing as far as he was concerned.

Once K-9 came aboard, they chose to have sex only in places the dog wasn't. Being watched by a robot was not a nice feeling to have. He'd prefer it to be something truly living, perhaps even joining along in their voyeuristic studies.

When Leela decided to stay on Gallifrey with a young Time Lord lad, he had been shocked. But still, he let her go.

None had been more surprised when a fellow Time Lord had joined him on his journeys, this one a woman who'd prefer to be known as Fred rather than Romana. So, Romana it was.

He was off again on a high with her. For the first time, he found himself enjoying sex with one of his own species. The urge was not there like it had been with the others, but he was so used to it by now, that he couldn't not try at least once. He found that he could actually become attached to a woman of his own species. It was wonderful. It was odd. It was sex with no strings attached.

He wouldn't have to marry her, she wouldn't have to marry him, and children were out of the question when it came to travelling in a TARDIS. Somehow, those differences made it all the more enjoyable.

When she stayed behind in E-Space, and Adric came along, he was at first both saddened and thrilled. The boy could help with the TARDIS somewhat, and he was still very young and was very easily aroused. He also had a thing about being tied up. He missed Romana though. He was truly beginning to miss his companions when they left him.

Once Nyssa of Traken had come on board, the sex was divided. He didn't get together with Nyssa oddly enough, preferring Adric and his quick to arouse male youth. Adric and Nyssa though got very close together and were found in sexual positions all around the TARDIS as far as he could tell.

They never invited him to join in, but they did allow him to watch, so watch he did. Sometimes he was close enough to them that he would come all over Adric's behind, which he fantasized about delving into him as the boy took Nyssa.

At first he had been very confused about Tegan. The Australian woman was snappy, had an attitude the size of her home country and had shown up when he had been in trouble with the Master. He'd had no time for her then, too busy worrying about the figure haunting his every move.

He soon found out that it was a ghost, a shadow, of his next self, who was telling him he was close to regeneration.

At least he regenerated around his friends and was taken care of during his crisis afterwards.

* * *

Reschal's hand moved over him, slowly, bringing him to the edge and stopping. Over and over she'd do this, until he'd beg her for release. Only then would she move her hand in the fast, frantic speed he used on himself every night now.

She had decided that she needed to take over on the tugging, as he just wasn't doing it right. Fast was not the way to go to learn to hold back. Slow, and knowing when to stop, was. So, she had her way with him like this, just with hands, every night she was home.

He knew she went out and tried to have sex with others. No one wanted her though, not now her name was tied to his. And he was the freak boy who would amount to nothing. It was only a matter of time before the ring came out again and he was forced into sex for the second time. Hopefully this time she'd try him without a ring, since he seemed to be getting better at it after this week of her 'lessons'.

He was falling behind in his classes at the Academy again, and Koschei was getting pissed off at him for reasons he couldn't work out. He was putting all his time and effort into finding a way out of this marriage without hurting anyone's feelings.

His life was once again falling to pieces around him. He would soon be living up to everyone's expectations of him and would end up doing nothing if he didn't find time to study and time to think. But it was becoming too hard for him. All his thought processes not going towards finding a way out of the marriage were going towards trying to think of ways to avoid sexual intercourse with his wife.

Even her touch was enough to get him to break out into a cold sweat now, and the only time he felt like he could truly avoid it was when he was once again being teased during lessons.

He came, bringing him out of the thoughts he had stuck himself in to prevent himself from thinking of what was happening to him at the time, and stared into Reschal's grinning face.

"Well, at least you're getting better. Might try sex tomorrow, huh? Without the ring. See how long you last now."

"Sure, okay. Maybe you'll get pregnant."

She smiled in what he could only presume was a good way, and nodded. "Yes, that would be good. Your father can then stop asking me every afternoon whether or not I am pregnant yet. That isn't going to happen for a while though if you don't learn to slow down a bit."

He sighed loudly. "I know, I will try. Promise."

The only way to keep her happy and content was to keep her thinking he was willing to do her every bidding.

He hated his life.

He wanted out as soon as possible.

He promised himself to stop trying to get out of the marriage right then and go back to concentrating on his classes. It was his only way out which enabled him to continue living.

Reschal was going to be the death of him otherwise.

* * *

He soon got used to Tegan.

Their banter and her temper made for great angry sex. Since this incarnation seemed a lot milder than others, it at least allowed him to vent some of his anger on someone who was ready and willing to take it and have fun in the process.

He knew that Tegan and Nyssa were close, and that Adric was both very pleased and terribly overexcited over it. It wasn't exactly what he expected to walk in on one day, but he soon found all three of them in bed with each other and an open invitation to join them.

Nyssa had never been interested in him like that in his last incarnation. Perhaps she was more attracted to younger looking men and women?

After Adric had been killed, the two girls seemed to forgo his company and stuck to themselves. He was too grieved to care much about it, although a little comfort would have been good.

Once Turlough had hopped on board, things had got hectic. Tegan hated the red headed man, Nyssa didn't seem to care either way and he, well, _he_ had an attraction a mile wide. He could barely look at the boy without getting an erection. And Turlough had started off trying to kill him too.

He failed miserably at being a murderer, but the sex was _great_.

He had pretty much the same mindless reaction to Peri's breasts every time she put them on display.

In the end though, they all left him, like everyone else seemed to do. Though in a way, it had been him who had left Peri, almost killed her in a regenerative craze. That moment shaped their future relationship.

* * *

Reschal liked to tie him up.

He hated it.

They had been married for a few years now, and she still hadn't got pregnant. He was beginning to suspect there was something wrong with his sperm, or perhaps her ova. Either way, he needed to get her pregnant to save his sanity.

She would let him go afterwards. She had promised, and Reschal might be a lot of bad things, but she never broke a promise.

He had buried himself in his schoolwork, forgetting as much as he possibly could what would happen when he got home, but at least the nightmare of slow painful starts and stops had finished. His close friendship with Koschei had started deteriorating from lack of time hanging around him and he was feeling down because of it. Even the Academy work was beginning to not interest him.

On the plus side, he now had control over his body's reactions.

Reschal had conditioned him to only come after she had. Anything else got him a flogging. Or the cock ring was taken out and put on as a punishment. She once tightened it hard enough to keep him erect, but not tight enough to make him lose said body part, for over two hours after having wound him up to the point of him almost coming.

He hated that damn flogger more than anything. Including the cock ring. Sometimes Reschal used both at the same time. She had no idea how much that _hurt_.

Tonight she had got what she called inventive, and had put a chastity belt on him after he had accidentally come before her. He had been wound up so tight beforehand though, from a mixture of foreplay and stress that he had gone off prematurely.

She told him that there was to be no sex for the next week, and that he better not do it again. He had felt relieved at hearing about the punishment and, instead of staying at their home, he had taken off back to the dorm room he shared with Koschei when he was staying at the Academy.

"Hey!" he said, as he entered the room, watching as Koschei did some type of experiment at his desk.

"Oh, hey. How long are you staying? I'm going out now."

That was code for 'you're here, thanks for spoiling my night.' He sighed, flopped onto his bed and found himself fighting tears. "I'll be staying the night. When are you getting back?"

Koschei, shrugged and didn't even bother turning to look at him, as he grabbed a bag from one of his corners of the room and went to the door. "I won't. I'll be staying with Ushas tonight."

With that said, his best friend left him, simply because he had arrived. He had lost his freedom, he had lost any hope he had of becoming his own person sexually if it was going to happen naturally, he had lost the ability to say no and to not be ordered around by others. Now he had also lost his friend.

He cried himself into a fitful sleep that night.

* * *

His relationship changed hugely with Peri. For one thing, he was much more aggressive, assertive and arrogant this time around. He found that Reschal's style of sex suited him, especially with Peri.

Peri, he had found out, liked to be handled roughly, liked the toys he managed to find in a room in the TARDIS, liked the sex to be rough, bordering on what he would normally call abuse. But it was all consensual.

When it had been happening to him, he had hated it. To see there were people who really did like it actually made him relax a bit.

He had thought he had harmed their friendship to the point of exterminating it entirely, but instead they bonded even further.

Oh, he never loved Peri, not in that way at least, but he had definitely enjoyed a bit of hard, rough sex with her, which let him deal with some of the earlier sexual experiences which had been all nightmares for him.

Once she had left him, and he still wasn't sure whether she had been killed or ended up married to that King chap. It was a good thing for Peri that he also liked rough. He hoped she ended up married and not dead. He was sure those two would make a rather oddball, but good, couple.

Mel turned his life upside down again after that.

She was always pushing him to do things he didn't want, like exercise and drink carrot juice. All she wanted was to make him healthy.

They rarely had sex. And when they did, it was usually Mel's excitement getting the better of her seeing him on an exercise bike, that she'd climb onto his lap, make him keep cycling, while she rode him hard and fast to some rather quick orgasms.

He had almost been relieved to regenerate.

* * *

He had failed his driving test! He passed everything but that one, major, _needed_, test. The one that would get him _off_ this forsaken rock and get a life of his own. All his dreams shattered before his eyes with the F on his paper for that.

Instead, after the graduation ceremony he had just sat through, Reschal with a huge grin on her face next to him, his mother watching, he had been assigned duty to file information on the major events of worlds in the Milky Way galaxy.

They knew he had a love of planets and other life forms, with a rather keen interest in Terra and thought he'd be happy there. That was the excuse they had given him and his parents anyway. He knew the truth.

They hated him so much they would keep him out of the way of 'civilized beings'.

He was driven home by his mother, his father having died the previous year. He had just lost his most wanted part of his dream job, he had to go home and try yet again to make a baby, after a decade of trying and not succeeding, and it was the anniversary of his father's death that day too.

He got home, went up to the bedroom, shed his clothes, and before Reschal was naked, burst into angry, hurt filled tears. "God, it's so unfair! Today has been the worst day of my life! It was supposed to be one of the best..."

"Hey, it could have been worse. You could have been put on security, or even worse, not passed your exams at all and ended up not being accepted as a Time Lord."

He shrugged, buried his head in his pillow and sniffed loudly. "I think I'd prefer that! At least then I wouldn't have had to have sat through hours of hope waiting for a TARDIS!"

Reschal, bitch that she was, laughed at that. "You honestly expected to pass your pilot exam? Theta, you're a bad pilot. You can't even steer a normal vehicle, let alone a TARDIS."

With that said she rolled him onto his back and scowled when, after five minutes of trying, she couldn't get him erect. "You're hopeless you know that!" she stated, before rolling off him and going to the room she used for sleep, leaving him to himself.

For the past few years, he had spent an odd number of hours crying. He had thought today he would be spared that. Instead, he ended up in an even worse state than usual.

He had to start his new job tomorrow, and he would be doing so exhausted.

He was going to be in so much trouble...

* * *

He never had sex with Mel again. And that was fine. The way she liked it simply wouldn't work as well now anyway. He was, in her estimation for those activities, too short.

He wasn't expecting Ace, but by god, he knew he had to have her the moment she came into his life. So young, so wonderfully smart, so aggressive, and, better yet, beautiful, and still growing too.

He manipulated her like it was the most natural thing in the world, and she knew it. She called him on it even. And yet she stayed with him. His Ace. Regardless of her hating people telling her what to do, saying how she should live, and manipulating her just as he was.

He was obsessed with her. He didn't know whether this was love or just that, but he definitely didn't ever want it to end.

But like all things, and all his companions, eventually it did come to an end. She had spent a few years studying to be a Time Lord, quit that, joined another time agency and ended up doing what they had done together on her own. On a time travelling motorbike.

He had never been more proud of what he did, knowing his Ace was out there, carrying on in his footsteps.

It told him he had done something right with her. She had grown into a marvellous woman, who did what she felt was right. And it _was_.

He didn't, no, _couldn't_, have another companion until the fateful shooting which led to his eventual regeneration through medical negligence.

* * *

After a century of Hell, his life had become so monotonous he had basically turned off his mind in favour of survival. He didn't want to die, and it was the only way to continue living. Things were so bleak and horrible for him, that sometimes he wondered why he even bothered with that.

He was hated at his work, though he liked his partner in the room he worked in well enough, and worse yet, he still had not conceived a child.

He had got himself tested the other day, worried that he was not viable, a waste of space and unworkable sperm, which nobody wanted anyway.

So, when he found that he had a letter in the mail, and saw Reschal reading it avidly herself, he didn't know what to make of her blank expression. Was it good or bad news? He tore the letter out of her hands, quickly went through it and smiled in relief when he found out that he was actually able to have children. In fact, according to these results, the problem wouldn't lie with him, but in Reschal.

Perhaps that's why she was shutting herself off, which usually meant that he'd be in trouble come their nightly round of sex to try yet again for a child. Maybe she was barren and unable to have children.

"Maybe you should get tested too. You know, just to make sure?"

She shook her head. "No point now. Doesn't matter if I have children or not, it was your side that harped on about it, and with your mother ill..."

His mother wasn't old, and she wasn't that badly ill, she'd be well again in a few days, yet Reschal made it sound like she was at death's door and knocking quite insistently upon it. He rolled his eyes. After all this time, he had thought he might at least have Reschal lighten up around him, but she never had. She never changed...

So, after she went out for the day to be with friends, he decided to do something daring and sneak into her room to see if there were any surprises waiting for him that night hiding in her drawers. When she got this pissed with him, the instruments of sexual torture were usually stored somewhere close by in her room.

Rather than finding some sex toy in close range, he instead found something that made his blood freeze and his whole body to start shaking.

Birth control pills.

She was taking birth control to purposefully not get pregnant. And, judging from his own sperm count and strength of them too, they would have had a whole gaggle of children already if she hadn't been taking them right from the outset.

She had been holding him a prisoner here for her own amusement, for her own sexual pleasure and sick mastery over his body.

He was nothing to her but a nice penis. Well, no more of that!

He promised himself, he'd never be submissive towards her ever again, he'd be assertive with his own life, he'd say no to having sex. He'd never have sex with her again if he had his way.

He was so angry with her, that he got his revenge the only way he thought possible. He switched out the birth control pills with something that looked identical but just wouldn't do the job.

When she got pregnant, he could boast that his swimmers were so good they could get even a barren, shrivelled up egg like those Reschal must have to gestate properly.

* * *

He got back together with Romana in his next incarnation. He never even really had time to run off and get a companion, since Grace and Lee had decided not to travel with him.

Well, for one thing, Lee had been more the Master's companion, than his own, but Grace, Grace had been great. Though all he had got from her was one very good kiss out of excitement. And there had been that moment where she had accidentally killed him after being told that there was a double exposure on his x-rays.

This was the time of the Last Great Time War, and it ripped entire worlds, entire civilizations apart. No one had been safe, not even them, the mighty Time Lords. And now, with his rogue mentality and ability to get out of nearly any situation, he had been called upon as the highest knowledgeable person in the universe with this sort of thing, and told to stop the Daleks.

He had. It wasn't his fault entirely that his stopping the Daleks also stopped the Time Lords.

Afterwards, he found he missed his people and wished them back into existence, but knew that would be good for no one.

He left, and vowed to never look back.

He survived an entire war that was fought over every living thing in the universe, survived intact and died after the fact from the shock of it.

It was terribly embarrassing and he then vowed to never tell anyone of it too.

He was glad he had got to be with the one Time Lord whom he had actually liked, maybe even loved once again before the end though.

He decided he hated, above all else, goodbye sex.

* * *

On the first go after he switched her pills, Reschal got pregnant. He had been overjoyed, she had been too busy vomiting to hit him.

Revenge. It was so sweet and lovely to see her suffering for a change, especially since she had hated the thought of becoming pregnant by him.

Also, as a bonus, even when she was going through her continuously aroused state at the beginning of the second trimester, she never wanted to have sex with him again. She vowed to divorce him as soon as the kid was born, he could even have the damned brat if he wanted to continue on his family name so much, and she'd leave.

He had been even more overjoyed with that news and, with a grin on his face accepted it with a rather cheerful "Alright!"

The brat was born a female and he cheerfully grabbed her and left the door open for Reschal to walk out of. It was their home, but it was the males who ran it. With how things had gone before, everyone had thought it was the other way around, including himself. Well no more.

"Don't even bother coming back, Reschal! I have my child and no longer need you. At least you have friends you can actually stay with. I've been basically a prisoner for a century. Now maybe you'll understand what being treated like nothing feels like!"

With that said, he slammed the door behind her slowly retreating form and had a panic attack. If she decided he was all bravado and was scared of her still, she'd turn around and kill him for it. Or make him hurt in unimaginable ways.

He didn't know which would be worse.

But now he could carry on his family line. As long as the baby didn't go to Reschal.

* * *

He had been so damaged after the war, the pain of his actions cutting through him in dangerous ways. Hell, he was off to blow himself up saving Earth from Autons just one more time, when it happened. He ran into a person who shouldn't have been there, grabbed her hand and was lost.

Her name was Rose Tyler. They were off basically having what to him had been cathartic sex, the moment she decided he was worth more than her traumatised boyfriend. To her it was a good time with a dangerous new guy.

And then he fell hard and fast for her and froze. Anyone he loved left. The girl was human and would die way before him anyway. Once Jack had joined he had been more than overjoyed. Rose and Jack hit it off instantly, but when the Doctor decided to get some of the man's action, Rose showed her jealousy.

He knew that having anyone else while Rose was travelling with him would be out of bounds.

He did the only thing he could think of. He stopped having sex with her.

He just plain stopped having sex.

The closest he got after that moment was a short kiss with Jack and sucking the damned Time Vortex out of Rose.

Once he regenerated, he knew things had changed considerably. He found himself in a body tailor made just for Rose Tyler. Damn his love for her.

He vowed never to do it again.

* * *

Reschal grinned knives at him, and he glared back. She had just officially divorced him and, being the mother, put in her vote that the child, Trivash was her given name when she reached schooling age, should go to her.

He put in that he had raised the girl, he had looked after her, he had helped her when she was sick, he had done all the work and he shouldn't have to just hand the kid over now that the hard part was over, just because the mother didn't like him.

Trivash was doing extremely well in school, he hadn't let her fall to the wayside like he had and made sure she'd do well, she had plenty of friends regardless of who her father was, and had shown that she was extremely smart.

He was deemed fit enough to parent and his mind stopped working for days after his defence to keep her actually won him custody. It turned out, with no parental bone in her body, and seen as having abandoned not only her kid but her husband, Reschal was seen as unfit.

Reschal never let that one go.

"You better believe I will get my revenge on you, you bastard. Watch your back, Theta, because I will be there when you won't expect to find me!"

She had been right. He hadn't expected her just after his mother's funeral. He'd been otherwise preoccupied with his grief.

She grinned at him, shaking his hands to hear the chains rattle, before scratching her long and pointed (damn her for making them that way just for this reason) fingernails down his chest, leaving lines of blood in their wake.

When her hand got lower and reached for his penis, he honestly thought she was going to rip the offending organ off his body.

She didn't.

He wished she had.

While she had been rough and angry before, it was nothing like this. He had been unsure due to their married state about what to call the actions of her sexual nature towards him before.

Well, now he knew.

He wanted to die.

* * *

Never say never ever.

The moment he had been alone with Rose, he immediately chewed her out for her abandonment of him during his regeneration sickness, before having wild "Thank god I'm still alive" sex with her up against the TARDIS console. The TARDIS was not pleased.

After that, they barely stopped. Until they almost got stuck on Krop Tor and he came to a rather horrid realisation. Rose reminded him of Reschal. They didn't look alike, and Rose was much younger, but that controlling aspect was there. She was the first companion he had ever had that refused to share him with anyone else, while she had full dibs on anyone she wanted. Soon enough, he was all she wanted.

Her talk of sharing a house and a mortgage and living together had absolutely horrified him. From then on, while he still enjoyed the sex and her company, he was wary of her, and tended to dodge personal questions.

It didn't stop him from hurting like hell when she got stuck on an alternate universe and he couldn't get to her.

Then came along Martha. Martha who loved him, but he didn't look twice at her. Oh, sure she had looks and brains and all the things he usually liked in a woman, but she had not been Rose and therefore hadn't been good enough.

By the time she'd stopped the Master's plot in its tracks they had both known he was lying about that.

The way he had regenerated not only for her, but having done so with a move very much like an intimate kiss, with his Ninth incarnation's feelings for her had made it that this incarnation would have no other.

Damn.

Well, he'd break that habit soon enough.

Not with Donna, after Martha had left under her own steam. Donna was too much like a little big sister to him to even think of having sex with her, and thankfully, she felt the same way back. But after her there had been Jackson, who had been so lonely and sleeping with the real Doctor was better than _being_ the Doctor.

Lady Christina had been absolutely lovely spread on the desert sand, which wasn't actually desert, let alone sand. Having the privacy for miles over dunes had been just what he had needed to get on with his work. Thankfully he had done it, as afterwards he had been too busy getting them out alive to even think of sex.

Adelaide he had basically hero worshipped. And in the end, he couldn't let her die. And she, doing the right thing in hindsight, took matters into her own hands and killed herself to make sure time stayed on track. He could have easily loved her, but his jealous streak this time around made it impossible, due to the cameras, and he hadn't wanted to share her with anyone else.

It was then he realised something. He was also reminding himself of Reschal. He managed to shake off, for a short time anyway, the almost insanity that had breached his mind and ran away.

It didn't stop him doing stupid things. Like, say, having sex with certain queens.

In the end he had hated the thought of regenerating, because he had come to rely, once more, on his own misery.

But he did and things, once again, felt right.

* * *

If it wasn't for his granddaughter, school name of Sinel, he doubted he'd still be alive.

And seeing his girls, one now happily married to a guard (Garrick by name) and the other enrolled in the Academy and at such a young age, was a little happiness in his otherwise bleak and useless life.

His job was as repetitive as ever, and doing the same thing over and over each and every day, sometimes just staring at data cubes and wishing for a tiny bit of excitement. When he got home, he was worried continuously that Reschal will be around every corner, ready to spring on him and have her way with him yet again.

The last made him shudder with horror just at the thought. Thankfully, since the last time, before Sinel was born, he had not seen his ex-wife again. He hoped that it stayed that way for the rest of his life.

He was drifting apart from Trivash, and he knew Reschal had something to do with that, since his daughter seemed to be getting cues from her mother now, saying things that only she would know. Her revenge was taking on a new form, one which didn't mean getting anywhere near him.

It was cruel of her, extremely cruel, to turn his daughter, one of two people left in the world who loved him unconditionally all her life, against him. Yet it was happening.

He took two weeks off work the day she showed up just to tell him that she never wanted to see him again and that she would try to stop him seeing Sinel. He'd been so down he hadn't been able to get out of bed, but he knew he had to get out and save both himself and the attentions his granddaughter was now receiving somehow.

Then one day, on his way home from work, he walked by a scrap heap and found exactly what he needed. A TARDIS, abandoned in favour of a new model, scared and looking for a new pilot.

Without even thinking about it, he knew he'd be that pilot even if it meant never coming back to Gallifrey again.

He understood exactly what it was like to be abandoned by all who supposedly loved him. He knew what it was like to be alone, scared and waiting to be crushed by some person who didn't care at all.

They were alike.

That day, he arrived home with a smile on his face.

* * *

The regeneration was a hard one and, to his ultimate good luck, he found himself being cared for by a young girl called Amelia. He had loved her name immediately, but she had been way too young for his normal tirades. He still offered her a ride, but he would keep it tame and PG level for the kid.

That plan was put on hold when he arrived back...a little late. Little Amelia had grown into a rather rowdy Amy, and oddly he wasn't interested in her sexually. To him, she was still little Amelia grown up, and it felt like sex should be off limits.

So, when she kissed him, he had been very much put off, and with her forceful ways, with her even trying to get his clothes off when he was saying no as much as possible, it felt like it was going to be Reschal and all that horrific life happening over again. She did stop eventually though, and she congratulated him on all his conquests even though she hadn't been one of them.

He relaxed after that, and found her fiancé to travel with them. Her sexual attentions then went to Rory.

Rory was a fine young man himself, and smart, though he rarely showed it. He was a nurse by choice, not a doctor like Amy wanted him to be. He looked unassuming, talking and acting like a normal guy who'd never do anything in his life that was out of the ordinary. Yet he was marrying his Amy, and was completely not fazed by the TARDIS being bigger on the inside, actually bothering to look up the science as much as he could in the 21st century to understand it, before travelling with him.

And then there was River. River was his go to girl this time around. He had met her in his last incarnation, and had been wondering about their relationship. Now he knew. It was sexual, it was beneficial to the both of them, it was rewarding. It was almost like they were married, just living life out of order.

It was wonderful and everything he imagined the kind of marriage a Time Lord should have.

He found himself wishing that it had been River he had been married to all those years. His life wouldn't have been so awful until acquiring his TARDIS.

For the first time, he felt like his life was on some sort of right track. He had the right type of relationship, he had great companions, and he and the TARDIS were still travelling the universe for fun and to help wherever they could.

Life was good.

* * *

Life was good.

He had managed to get Sinel out of the Academy one night, quickly and quietly asking if she would rather stay on Gallifrey and the stagnating hell it could be, or if she'd like to go with him.

She chose him.

Together they sneaked their way into the scrap yard, found the key to the soon-to-be-demolished TARDIS and, without a second look back, entered the ship and took off.

He had run away in a stolen TARDIS.


End file.
